Sayings To Mix in This (Memorial Day) Weekend
First it was merely words. Now it’s full on sayings. Unleashed and unleaded. You know the drill.
“That thing’s got good springs on it”
Fuck a silicon chip. Or a large language machine. We used to build real machines. With gears and springs, I’m sure. Friend and Pioneer contributor, Caniac Kemba knew it. That’s why he mixed this one in mid-hat-discussion. Read below:
Me: Wadupmyboi….Took a visit to the pro shop and acquired this twill-ass Smithers and Branson lid.
Caniac: Say act…Lemme see that?
*Grabs hat by the bill and inspects…*
Caniac: This thing’s got good springs on it.
“His golf pro, his analyst, and me…”
Another Caniac contribution. Maybe a play on the whole rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, but instead just start your story with…“His golf pro, his analyst, and me” if describing a real rag tag crew of roosters.
Me: Who pulled up to the func?
Caniac: Steve, his golf pro, his analyst, and me. The usual roosters, I guess.
Roosters…backdoor mix-in.
“Closing bell”
A friend of mine was in town last weekend. We inevitably made some plans. Here’s how it all went down:
Me: Yo yo what’s ur avail.
Spango: I’m en route to our place for tonight rn. Should we grab some cervezas after the closing bell?
Me: Fuckin great use of closing bell.
Gonna start getting this one in the mix, no doubt. When exactly is closing bell? We going by NASDAQ rules? The Nikkei 225 far out East? Who gives. When the timing is right…closing bell shall ring across the land.
“Make a word on her”
Aggressive at first, but after further inspection, quite cordial. Picture this. You’re in Boston. It’s 1997. You’re a brilliant psychologist, still grieving from the passing of your late wife. But then a genius from Southie becomes your new patient. Let’s call him Will Hunting. At first, he raw dogs your sessions, waiting for the clock to run out. But then you finally connect. Over baseball. You tell him a story about skipping the 1975 World Series to meet a woman you saw across the bar. You missed Pudge Fisk’s walk off homer and Will Hunting can’t believe it. He asks you how the hell your buddies let you get away with that? And that’s when you tell Matt Da—-I mean Will Hunting…
I slid my ticket across the bar and said I’m sorry fellas…I’ve gotta go make on word her.
Months later, Will Hunting skips town to chase a nice British lady across the country. He leaves you a note.
Tell the professor I’m sorry…I had to go make a word on her.
“Live arm”
Call it the City Connect of got good springs, here’s an alternative way to provide just about anything its flowers. But save this saying for something a little unexpected. Whenever you’ve got live arms in the bullpen and whatever that bullpen might be. Need help? Take this one out for a walk around the block:
Me: What’s your second date plan with Lisa?
Jimmy: Prob just invite her over for a meal. Maybe wrestle up some Cacio e pepe.
Me: Damn. You cook?
Jimmy: Of course. I’ve got a real live arm in the kitchen.
Me: Great use.
Smathers and Branson mentioned. Ball knower.